Every child is unique, but our 3rd son Herbie has shown us just how different—and wonderful—communication can be when it’s grounded in understanding, patience, and compassion. Herbie has a diagnosis of Aurism and ADHD and has a PDA profile — a way of being in the world that means everyday demands can feel overwhelming, threatening, or impossible rather than simply annoying or inconvenient.

One of the biggest shifts in our family life has been learning what PDA actually is, and how something as simple as the words we use can make all the difference.

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So What is PDA ? How is it for Herbie)?

Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) is a profile of autism characterised by extreme resistance to everyday demands and expectations — not because a child is defiant or “chooses not to comply,” but because their nervous system interprets demands as threats. The moment a demand is felt, it can trigger anxiety, overwhelm or shutdown. Even with percieved or silent demands.

Importantly, PDA has nothing to do with wilfulness or lack of discipline from ” weak parenting”. When someone like Herbie with a PDA profile avoids something — even something they genuinely want — their body and nervous system are reacting as if they’re under threat. This isn’t bad behaviour, it’s a nervous system response — a survival instinct, not a choice. ITS PAINFUL for him at times!

Dr Naomi Fisher, a clinical psychologist who works with children and adults with PDA, talks about this extensively. She explains that what looks like avoiding tasks, controlling behaviour, or saying “no” repeatedly is actually a logical response to anxiety. The more a child perceives control or pressure — even indirect pressure — the more their nervous system goes into survival mode, making demands feel intolerable.

In her words, PDA isn’t something to be “fixed”; it’s a profile that needs to be understood. For Herbie, this insight has transformed the way we parent, communicate, and support him.

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What is Declarative Language — and Why It Matters

One of the most powerful tools we learned about on our PDA journey is declarative language.

🔹 Imperative language vs Declarative language

Imperative language is directive — it gives instructions, expectations, or demands. For a child with PDA, even gentle-sounding requests can feel like commands demanding compliance:
👉 “Put on your shoes.”
👉 “Time to brush your teeth.”
👉 “You have to get ready for bed now.”

Even when meant kindly, these can trigger anxiety, overwhelm, resistance or shutdown because they feel like pressure to comply.

Declarative language, on the other hand, shares information without asking for compliance. It invites awareness, reflection or choice, but doesn’t carry the psychological “threat” of a demand. Declarative language helps a child feel safe and competent rather than cornered.

📌 Examples of Declarative Language

Here are some real-world examples:

Declarative language doesn’t demand anything — it shares something and this subtle shift can reduce pressure and give children like Herbie space to respond on their own terms.

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Why This Works

When we use declarative language, we are:

✔ Reducing psychological pressure
✔ Increasing autonomy and safety
✔ Lessening defensive reactions
✔ Supporting regulation of the nervous system

For a child whose nervous system is highly sensitive to perceived demands, this can mean the difference between shutdown and engagement. This isn’t about permissiveness or letting a child “rule the house”; it’s about meeting them where they are neurobiologically.

Dr Naomi Fisher emphasises that behaviours like avoiding demands, withdrawing, negotiating or saying “no” are responses rooted in anxiety and survival, not behaviour that’s chosen or manipulative. When we understand that, everything changes.

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What We’ve Learned from Herbie

Herbie has taught us that:

❤️ His resistance isn’t willful — it’s a nervous system response.
❤️ When he feels less pressured, he stays calmer, more engaged, and more willing to participate.
❤️ Using declarative language doesn’t magically make demands disappear — but it reduces the fight-or-flight reaction that used to turn every tiny request into a battle.

We don’t have perfect days. But understanding PDA through the lens of nervous system regulation, and communicating through declarative language, has brought trust, connection, and peace into our home.

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Supporting a child with a PDA profile means rethinking what “communication” and “compliance” really mean. It’s not about parental control — it’s about love, connection, safety, and collaboration. When we let go of the notion that our children are being difficult on purpose, space opens up for understanding, confidence, and joy.

If you’re walking a similar path with your child, know this: the words we choose matter — not because they control behaviour, but because they shape experience.

© 2026 Awesome Archie Non-Profit. All writing and images are owned and protected. Unauthorized use is prohibited.

First of all — a huge sorry for the delay in getting this blog out. The last few weeks have been a complete whirlwind BUT in the best possible way. Between events, planning, meetings, and a mountain of behind-the-scenes work, the days have just flown by. It’s been busy, exciting, a little bit chaotic… but totally worth it.

Now that things have settled just enough to catch a breath, it feels like the perfect moment to share everything that’s been happening at team Awesome Archie.

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Awesome Archie proudly supports the UHD Charity & the “Do IT for the Kids” Campaign.

One of the biggest highlights recently has been Awesome Archie stepping up to support the brand-new fundraising campaign, “Do IoT for the Kids.” This initiative, created by the brilliant UHD Charity, aims to stock its new children’s ward with sensory toys, artwork and activities to make young people’s experiences more positive. The new unit will be opening in Royal Bournemouth Hospital’s BEACH Building this summer, but additional items are not covered by government funding. We have the “beautiful cake… but now we need the sprinkles” 😉

The official launch was nothing short of magical — a Mad Hatters Tea Party that perfectly captured the creativity and imagination behind the campaign. From colourful decorations to playful themes and smiling faces everywhere, the event set exactly the right tone: fun, inclusive, and full of hope for the future.

Why This Campaign Matters So Much

“Do IT for the Kids” isn’t just another fundraiser — it’s about opening doors. Technology is shaping the world faster than ever, and access to digital tools and learning can make a life-changing difference. By supporting this campaign, we’re not only raising funds; we’re helping build confidence, skills, and futures. Kids need education and play, it’s their lawful right, so we are supporting the fundraising efforts. We aim to help raise £350.000 but we can only do this with YOUR HELP!

We are so PROUD and greatful to be able to support this AWESOME cause!

more deets here… https://www.uhdcharity.org/kids/

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The “Day Job” I Truly Love

Alongside all the excitement of events and campaigns, I’ve also been fully immersed in my day job — working as a consultant ( current role is in tech support) for IMROC — and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. It’s one of those roles that constantly challenges me but i LOVE IT! Every single day brings something new to learn, a new problem to solve, or a new awesome person to connect with.

What I love most is the people that I get to interact with. I’ve had the chance to meet some truly amazing individuals — passionate, driven, and endlessly supportive. There’s something super fulfilling about being able to help others but while being helped too!

I genuinely feel very lucky to be in a position where I’m learning every day while also feeling valued and useful. Not everyone gets to say they enjoy their day job, so I will never take that for granted.

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And Lastly- A Week of Just Being Mum 😍

After all the busyness, I’m really looking forward a whole week dedicated to just being a Mum. No big launches, no packed schedules, no rushing around… just slowing down and enjoying the everyday moments.

The plan? Plenty of chilling, movie nights under blankets, maybe a cheeky takeaway or two, and yes — the inevitable cleaning days for me… blurrrggh. But even the boring loo cleaning bits have their place. For me there is so much comfort in our private, gentle routine and a kind of peace in doingnothing with the people who matter most….our awesome kids 🙂

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And finally, a massive thank you to everyone who continues to support, encourage, and cheer from the sidelines. Whether it’s through kind messages, shares, follows or simply taking the time to read these updates — it truly means more than you know. Here’s to balance, gratitude, and whatever exciting (or relaxing!) weeks come next.

The internet is full of advice about autism, ADHD, and neurodivergence — but let’s be honest, a lot of it is either overwhelming, overly clinical, or completely disconnected from real life.

We are so proud to share our family journey across many platforms however, Archie and I are noticing that there is still a big lack of ” back to basics- quick grab” advice online.

That’s exactly why @neurocreativemedia on Instagram exists.

We created this page to be a back-to-basics hub for autistic, ADHD, and neurodivergent people who want clear, practical, and validating information — without having to decode academic jargon or dig through misinformation.

Think of it as a one-stop shop for quick-fire insights, grounded in both lived experience and never ending academic research.

Why We Launched @ NeuroCreativemedia

Many of us grew up without the language to describe what we were experiencing. We were told we were “too sensitive,” “lazy,” “difficult,” or “not trying hard enough.” A lot of us learned to mask, overperform, and push through — often at the cost of our mental health.

We wanted to create a space that says:

You’re not broken! Your brain isn’t a problem to fix and you deserve information that respects your intelligence and your experience!

@neurocreativemedia is BRAND NEW and is about stripping things back to what actually matters — how neurodivergent brains work, how that shows up day to day, and what genuinely helps.

What You’ll Find on our “fledging” Page

This isn’t about trends or aesthetics (though we do love a good clean graphic). It’s about usable knowledge.

With us you’ll find:

Everything we share is shaped by OUR real lived experience, backed up by credible research, and translated into language that doesn’t feel like homework.

No gatekeeping. No “you must experience it this way.” Just information, perspective, and care.

Who This Page Is For

@neurocreativemedia is for:

You don’t need a diagnosis to belong here. Curiosity, openness, and respect are enough.

Why Following Actually Matters

When you follow and share neurodivergent-led pages, you’re doing more than boosting an account — you’re helping shift the narrative.

You’re supporting autistic voices like mine and my sons.
You’re helping accurate information reach people who need it.
You’re helping someone feel seen for the first time.

Community care starts with visibility.

Let’s Build This Together

@neurocreativemedia isn’t about talking over the autistic and neurodivergent community — it’s about growing with it.

If you’re looking for:

We’d love for you to join us. Please do drop us a follow…it would mean the world!

Follow @neurocreativemedia on instagram…link here…

https://www.instagram.com/neurocreativemedia/

Share what resonates
And help us build a calmer, clearer corner of the internet — together.

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Lately, life has felt super full but in the best possible way. Ridiculously busy, but truly awesome. As I look around at what I’m doing right now, who I’m supporting, who’s supporting me and what we rare all learning, I feel incredibly grateful for this season of my life 🙂

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A Dream in Progress: My New Role at IMROC

I recently started a new role as Tech Support and Trainee Trainer at IMROC, and honestly, it feels like a dream has come true. There is no question that the work is hard for me, I have to focus for very long periods of time which is a natural struggle of mine! But, I’m learning as I go, mistakes and all, gaining confidence with each challenge and growing into the role day by day. There’s something really special about being trusted to support others while also being supported myself as I learn. No two days are the same, and that’s exactly what I love about it.

This amazing role combines empathy,patience, and people skills — and I feel lucky to be developing all three in an environment that genuinely values individual growth. It’s not about knowing everything already ( thank goodness) it’s about showing up, learning, and doing your best…. whatever that may look like! I am so thankful to Kellie and Max ( my Trainers) for their unbelievable kindness and understanding and I can’t wait to see how we work together moving forward.

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Awesome Archies Connection Club

Alongside “work-work”, my volunteer role with Awesome Archies Connection Club is still going strong — and my heart couldn’t be fuller.

Watching the little club grow and become such a positive and empowering space has been incredibly rewarding. The connections being made, the confidence building, and the joy in the room remind me exactly why this work matters so much. These kids need connection, need empathy and deserve no judgement and that’s what they get from our little club.

I feel incredibly lucky to support such amazing children. Each one brings something unique and it’s a privilege to be part of their learning journey. Volunteering in this way doesn’t feel like “just” volunteering — it feels like purpose, community, and connection all rolled into one. Archie and I LOVE planning our weekly activities and then seeing how the kids enjoy them 🙂

Massive thanks to the Priory school for giving us this opportunity.

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Published In The SEN Magazine 🙂

Issue 140 ● January February 2026

This month also brought another moment of pride — being published once again in SEN Magazine.

No matter how many times it happens, it still feels amazing. Each publication brings a mix of excitement, gratitude, and a quiet sense of “wow, we really did that.” Archie and I feel incredibly thankful and privileged to have a platform to share our voice, experiences, and passion within the SEN community.

Being published isn’t something I ever take lightly. It’s a reminder that stories matter, lived experience counts, and that sharing them can make an awesome difference.

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When I pause and reflect on all of this — new role, volunteering, and writing — I feel proud, grateful, and hopeful. I’m learning, growing, supporting others, and doing work that truly matters . I still cant quite believe it!

So here’s to continuing to learn as we go, staying thankful, and embracing every opportunity that comes our way …even though its scary sometimes!

People say it like it’s comforting. “We all have the same 24 hours in a day.” But if you have ADHD, that statement can often feel less like reassurance and more like an accusation or suggestion of failer.

I am a proud AuDHDer meaning that my Autistic brain loves order, routine and predictability but my ADHD ( I am predominantly the hyperactive type although I have a spiky profile) means that I crave the dopamine rush of impulsivity and when I decide to “decorate the lounge” I need to do it.. now! It drives my husband to distraction however, generally this combo means that I am quite productive most of the time, often to the point of near burn out…not ideal! However, on some occasions and for many ADHDers, particually if they lean more to the “innattentive” side ( hate that term btw) there are real challenges to get what others may perceive as a small task, even started.

With this neurotype somehow your day disappears. Time slips through your fingers. You sit down to do one small thing and suddenly it’s dark outside, your brain feels fried, and you’re left wondering how you managed to be busy all day and still get pretty much nothing done.

So… why does it feel like that 24 hours move at double speed?

ADHD time isn’t the same as everyone else’s

One of the biggest misunderstandings about ADHD is that it’s ALL about attention. In reality, it’s often about executive function — things like prioritising, starting tasks, switching between them, and sensing time. Neurodivergent related perfectionism is also a brilliant task stopper because if you can’t get the job done to your ideal, you cant start it! SO FRUSTRATING!

ADHD paralysis is also a perfect example of this.

You want to do the thing, you know you need to do the thing, you may even be thinking about the thing constantly because its making you unhappy ( housework or responding to emails are fab examples of this)

And yet… your body won’t move OR it moves regularly by constantly filling that time with literally ANYTHING other than the thing that needs to be done!

That’s not laziness. That’s not a lack of motivation. That’s your nervous system being overwhelmed by too many tasks, too much pressure, or fear of doing it “wrong”. Again, for a perfectionist , not being able to complete a task makes it feel “wrong!”

Alex Partridge talks about this brilliantly in his book Now It All Makes Sense — how ADHD brains can short-circuit when a task feels emotionally or cognitively heavy, even if it looks simple from the outside. So time passes, the clock keeps ticking and you’re stuck in freeze mode, watching the hours disappear.

Please do check out Alex’s books and listen to his podcast ADHD chatter, it’s helped me so much!

Saying “yes” to everyone costs you time you don’t have, so why cant you say no?

The podcast “ADHD chatter” has really helped me to understand this a whole lot better. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is the intense emotional response to perceived rejection that so many people with ADHD experience. RSD doesn’t just hurt your feelings. It hijacks your decisions. You say yes to things you don’t want to do. You over-explain. You agree to help, attend, fix, support — even when you’re already exhausted and really want to say NO!

You say yes again and again, not because you want to but because no feels dangerous. You are terrified of conflict and truly believe that saying no to that night out with the girls will mean that your friends will hate you.

For someone with RSD, saying no can feel like you’re letting everyone down, you’re being difficult or you’ll be disliked or abandoned.

So you keep being a yes person while forgetting that the only person you are letting down is yourself, because YOU matter and giving everything to everyone else (through fear of rejection) means you are neglecting yourself!!!

Suddenly your already-limited energy and time are being spent on everyone else, while the things you actually need — rest, creativity, basic life admin — get pushed to the bottom of the list. Is it any wonder your day feels shorter than everyone else’s?!

A lot of ADHD time loss doesn’t come from doing nothing — it comes from mentally recovering.

Recovering from masking, from overwhelm, from shame.
Recovering from repeatedly beating yourself up for not being able to do things like those around you can.

The ADHD Chatter podcast does a brilliant job of naming this — how much unseen effort goes into just existing with ADHD. When you remember our emotional processing, sensory overload, and constant self-doubting, it’s obvious that your day is packed in ways others never see. You’re not behind, you’re just carrying more than maybe you even realised.

So, what are some gentle ways to support yourself (without fixing yourself, because you are not broken!)

You don’t need to become more disciplined., if anything you need more self compassion and to think about better systems to support yourself. I am an avid list maker…it keeps me on task and I love seeing the small achievements ticked off that then turn into a big job completed.

Maybe you could

1. Shrink the task until it feels almost silly, Alex talks about crushing the big block of ice into little chips for example…

Instead of “write the email”, try: Open laptop, find email, write one sentence and strangely, momentum often follows action — but that action has to feel safe and doable first.

2. Give yourself permission to say no badly
You don’t owe perfect explanations.
“No, I can’t this time” is enough.
Discomfort doesn’t mean danger — even when RSD tells you it does.

3. Externalise time
Timers, alarms, visual clocks, body doubling — ADHD brains struggle to feel time. Make it visible and shared where possible.

4. Build in recovery time like it’s essential (because it is)
Rest isn’t a reward for productivity. It’s a requirement for functioning.

5. Learn from ADHD voices, not productivity gurus
Resources like ADHD Chatter and Alex Partridge’s books don’t try to turn you into someone else — they help you understand yourself. And understanding reduces shame, which frees up more energy than any planner ever could. The SENDcast is fab for this too!

And remember, your 24 hours aren’t broken…they are uniquely yours.

If your days feel shorter, it’s not because you’re failing at time, it’s because your brain experiences the world differently. You’re navigating paralysis, emotional intensity, people-pleasing, and an invisible workload most people never have to think about. So the next time someone says, “We all have the same 24 hours,” remember:

You’re doing more than they can see,
You’re not lazy — you’re overloaded.
And you’re allowed to build a life that actually fits the way your brain works.

BUT… Accepting your brain type — diagnosis or not — is the first and most important step. Not fixing it, not fighting it, not trying to force yourself into systems that were never designed for you. Acceptance doesn’t mean giving up; it means finally stopping the war with yourself. When you understand that your brain simply works differently, you can start to let go of the shame, the constant self-criticism, and the exhausting cycle of trying to be like others. From that place, self-love becomes possible, and self-support starts to make sense. You stop asking, “What’s wrong with me?” and start asking, “What do I need?” And that shift — from resistance to acceptance — is where real movement, compassion, and healing begin.

Have an awesome week xxx

Rebecca- founder of Awesome Archie non profit.

Every year when December creeps in, so does all the pressure. The lights go up, the invites roll in, and suddenly there’s this unspoken expectation that Christmas should be magical, loud,family filled, social, and busy. But when you’re a parent carer, Christmas doesn’t always look or feel like that. Sometimes, “escaping Christmas” isn’t selfish or dramatic—it’s survival. It’s love. It’s choosing calm over chaos for the sake of what your child needs.

For me, prioritising Archie has always meant stepping away from the big family gatherings, the noise, the unpredictability, and the overwhelm. It means saying no when everyone else around me is able to say yes. It means leaving events early, or not even going at all. And deep down, I know it’s the right thing for Archie. I know his comfort, safety, and emotional wellbeing matter far more than any tradition ever could.

But that doesn’t mean it’s easy and I often feel like I am missing out. When people moan and say things like, “oh I haven’t had time, I’ve been out so much with friends” I want to shout in their faces and make them see how fortunate they are! (I don’t…to be clear 😉

Because all the while that am proudly protecting and supporting my Awesome Archie, I’m also silently grieving the version of Christmas that I used to enjoy of I thought I’d have as a big family. The laughter around the table with ALL the family. The last-minute plans and the buzz and excitement that it can bring. The feeling of belonging in big family moments. Instead, there are so many times where I feel like I’m watching life happen from the sidelines—present for my child, but absent from the world. And that can feel incredibly isolating .Last night my husband and other kids stayed out till almost midnight having fun a frivolity at a christmas family gathering and I was at home on the sofa from 4 pm because Archie needed to be home. No matter how neuroaffirming and proud you are …THAT SUCKS!!!

There’s a huge part of me that celebrates that I am “Mum the carer”, strong and resilient and endlessly giving, especially when I know that NOONE else could do this for him as well as I do. But there’s also still me, Beckie—the individual who often wants to feel included, wanted, carefree, and part of something bigger than responsibilities. Missing out doesn’t always look dramatic; sometimes it’s just a quiet ache, a reminder that my life is different and will always be different, that I am not who I once imagined I would be.

And here’s something that all too often goes unsaid: parent carers make underappreciated and unnoticed sacrifices every single day, not just at Christmas. Sacrifices that aren’t wrapped in tinsel or celebrated in cards. The kind that happen quietly—cancelled plans, emotional labour, exhaustion, guilt, worry, endless advocating, and constantly putting someone else’s needs above your own. It can be extremely lonely and can cause real lasting damage in relationships.

It is so important to acknowledge that. To say it out loud. To recognise that mums like me don’t just “get on with it”. We adapt. We bend. We give. We sacrifice and sometimes, we break a little too.

When those sacrifices go unrecognised, when it starts to feel like you’re taken for granted or simply expected to cope, it can put a strain on everything—relationships, mental health, even your sense of identity. Feeling unseen and unimportant hurts. Feeling like what you do is “just what mums do” instead of something totally extraordinary chips away at your inner strength.

So if you’re a parent carer reading this, I NEED you to know this… I SEE YOU!!!

You are allowed to prioritise your child.
You are allowed to feel isolated.
You are allowed to grieve the things you miss out on.
You are allowed to want recognition, appreciation, and understanding.
None of that makes you selfish. It makes you human.

Escaping Christmas doesn’t make us weak parents. If anything, it proves how fiercely we love our children and how we truly put their needs before our own. But we too deserve support, compassion, and the space to say “this is hard” without guilt.

This year, I’m choosing what’s right for Archie. And I’m also choosing to be honest about how that feels—for both of us.

Because acknowledging the sacrifice doesn’t take away from the pride, affirmation and love. It simply reminds the world that mums like me are still here, still a person with her own wants and needs and still deserving of appreciation too.

Awesome Archie – Our 2025 Year in Review

As we wrap up another incredible year here at Awesome Archie, we’re taking a moment to reflect on the milestones, memories, and moments of connection that made this year so special. None of this would be possible without our amazing and super supportive community, and we are so proud to share what we’ve achieved with your help! THANKYOU!

Building connection through the Awesome Archie Connection Club

One of our proudest achievements this year was launching the Awesome Archie Connection Club at a local school. This initiative was created by Archie and run by me to support children who sometimes find playtime tough – whether that’s navigating friendships, managing sensory overload, or simply finding a safe space to be themselves.

Through kindness, understanding, and structured play, our club has become a place where children feel seen, supported, and included. Watching friendships grow and confidence bloom has been one of the most rewarding parts of our year. We will of course be continuing this into 2026 and are immensely grateful for the opportunity!

This year also brought an incredible opportunity for us to share our lived experience of autism and neurodiversity with staff at JPMorgan Chase. Being invited into such a major organisation to talk openly about what it means to navigate work, education, and everyday life as an autistic person was both humbling and empowering. This session wasn’t just about awareness, but about building genuine understanding, breaking down stereotypes, and creating more inclusive workplaces where people feel safe to be their authentic selves.

What made the experience so special was the openness and respect shown by the staff. The conversations were honest, thoughtful, and full of curiosity – not just about challenges, but about strengths, talent, and the unique perspectives neurodivergent people bring to teams. Knowing that this session may help shape more compassionate policies and everyday practices was incredibly meaningful, and it reminded me why sharing lived experience is one of the most powerful tools for real and lasting change.

Supporting children through long hospital stays with The UHD Charity

This year, we were honoured to support the UHD charity, helping to raise awareness and funds for children facing long-term hospital stays. These children and their families show extraordinary strength every day, and we felt privileged to play a small part in helping bring comfort, hope, and smiles during incredibly challenging times.

To support, Daisy created and presented an assembly infront to 200 kids, I hosted a week long Art session with a fundraising exhibition and we have been interviewed and photographed to help with the charities promo work.

Through fundraising, advocacy, and community support, we helped shine a light on the reality of long-term hospital stays and the importance of donating time, resources, and care to make those stays a little brighter. Please do check out their website to see what a difference you can make with just a small donation this Christmas.

The BEACH Appeal

Wonderdog Winnie’s amazing assistance dog journey

A highlight of the year was watching our beloved Wonderdog Winnie become a fully fledged assistance dog. Winnie’s journey has been nothing short of inspiring – from intense training to finally achieving her official status. She’s become a symbol of calm, comfort, and the power of support for Archie , Herbie and I, and we couldn’t be prouder of her.

Winnie now goes where Archie goes and recognises the signs of Archie becoming dysregulated and lays on his lap or chest. She sits in his wheelchair with him, lays in his arms as we shop etc, she is AWESOME!! Wonderdog Winnie- WE ADORE YOU!!!

Carols on the driveway – bringing the community together

In true Awesome Archie style, we ended the year surrounded by music, lights, and togetherness with our Awesome Archie Carols on the Driveway. Seeing neighbours and families gather to sing, laugh, and celebrate the season was magical.

We were incredibly lucky to be supported by the Boscombe Salvation Army Band, whose music lifted spirits and filled our street with festive joy. Moments like these remind us why community matters so much. Thanks so much to all who came and to the band for giving your time (for free) just to spread the Christmas message and raise community spirits.

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And Finally… A personal dream came true

On a personal note, this year brought to life a dream that’s been years in the making. My aim when starting Awesome Archie was to make real, lasting change. To share our life experience to bust myths and smash stereotypes and 5 years on , a phenomenal opportunity arouse… I was honoured to land a dream role as a contractor with IMROC.

IMROC (Implementing Recovery through Organisational Change) is a UK-based charity that helps transform mental health and social care systems globally, focusing on recovery-oriented, person-centred support, especially for those with mental health, autism, or long-term conditions, using co-production, training (like Recovery Colleges), consultancy, research, and peer support to build hope and empower people and communities.

This role is so meaningful to me because it brings together everything I care deeply about: lived experience, community, mental health, and creating real, lasting change. To be able to work alongside people who value lived experience, co-production, and hope is more than a job – it’s a privilege. It feels like the next chapter of my own journey, and I’m so grateful to be able to give back in a way that feels so true to who I am personally.

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts

To every volunteer, supporter, donor, school, family, and child who has been part of our year – thank you. Awesome Archie has always been about kindness, inclusion, and connection, and this year showed us just how powerful those values can be.

So as the year comes to a close, we’d like to thank you for your continued support and wish you all a very happy Christmas and every good wish for the year ahead. Here’s to another year of compassion, community, and creating brighter days together. 😍

HAPPY CHRISTMAS ALL!!!

This week felt like a real full-circle moment for Archie and me—one of those rare, powerful reminders of how far we’ve come and why we continue doing what we do.

We were invited for an exclusive, behind-the-scenes look at the brand-new children’s wards at the newly built Bournemouth Hospital. The Children’s Hospital isn’t officially opening until June, but we were granted special early access so we could offer our support and see the space that will soon be transforming the lives of so many young patients and their families.

Walking along those enormous brand spangly new corridors ( ready for murals to be painted) with Archie by my side was incredibly emotional. It took me straight back to his own journey—a journey that began with a “minor” surgery but quickly turned into something much bigger. Although the operation itself was straightforward, the medical complications and neurological challenges that go alongside our daily lives, made it a major event for the both of us.

Through all of it, we were met with nothing but empathy, care, and genuine respect from the incredible medical teams who supported us. That experience is exactly why we’ve spent the months since fundraising, raising awareness, and giving back to the UHD Charity in every way we can.

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A Thank-You From Us to Them: “Awesome Archie Has Surgery”

As our way of saying thank you—and as a way to help other children facing scary or unfamiliar medical experiences—Archie and I wrote a children’s book titled Awesome Archie Has Surgery which we officially donated it to the hospital for them to use as a resource to support young patients and spread awareness in an accessible, child-friendly way. Seeing the staff’s reactions, and knowing it will help children feel braver and more prepared, was incredibly special.

Art, Awareness, and the BEACH Appeal

Back in the summer we hosted an Arts Week exhibition to raise funds specifically for the BEACH Appeal—UHD’s campaign dedicated to developing the new children’s unit. Rooms full of colour, creativity, and community came together for a single purpose: to give future families the kind of support Archie and I were lucky enough to receive.

And as if the week wasn’t meaningful enough already, Archie and I were also interviewed and filmed to support the hospital’s upcoming promotional work. Watching him talk confidently, proudly, and openly about his journey was one of those proud-parent moments I’ll never forget. He doesn’t see himself as awesome—but he really is.

@awesomearchie_

Arts week 2025- educating and fundraising on behalf of the BEACH appeal #fypageシ #adhd #autism #awesomearchie #awesomearchienonprofit #summer #beach #fundraiser #art #teachersoftiktok @UHDcharity

♬ original sound – 𝕃𝕪𝕣𝕚𝕔𝕤 – user31218590737

Here’s How You Can Help—And Why It Matters.

The new children’s hospital will soon open its doors, but a building is only the beginning. Creating a nurturing, comforting, fully resourced environment takes community. It takes people like you. The NHS provide the bulding and the medical equipment but kids like Archie need so much more.

Here’s what your support can do:

Every donation, every share, every bit of awareness you spread helps shape the future of pediatric care here in Bournemouth. You can genuinely support the most vulnerable children in their hardest moments, what a gift!

We’ve seen firsthand what this hospital can do. We’ve lived it. And now, we’re honoured to play even a tiny part in supporting its future.

Thank you for being here, for rooting for Archie, and for helping us make sure other families receive the same care, kindness, and hope we did.

Please go to the BEACH appeal UHD website here below to offer your help….you can really change a families life this Christmas!

When I was studying history in senior school 3 million years ago, I remember my favourite teacher (Miss Halford ) talk about how when we write we need to give pro’s and cons for everything. How even though we may have a clear answer in our head we must always share opinion from both sides of an argument to get a more rounded decision from the reader. So this post is just that, Archie and I DO have a clear favourite, but that’s just our view through our own personal experience. Each child and situation is unique so we are totally ok with you disagreeing with us, we just want to share what we have learned to help school staff moving forward and who knows…you may feel the same?

As all SENCO’s will testify, supporting children’s sensory needs is one of the most powerful ways to help them succeed in school—academically, socially, and emotionally. On a regulated child can learn! Two supporting approaches often chatted about are sensory circuits and sensory movement breaks. Both can be brilliant tools, but they work in very different ways and in my years of school support I’ve learned that for me, one has offered more flexibility, practicality, and real-world impact.

But in the words of Miss Halford “Let’s take a look at each before we give away our conclusion”

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So,What Actually Are Sensory Circuits?

Sensory circuits are structured, three-part activity routines often embedded into a timetable. They should include:

1. Alerting activities
2. Organising activities
3. Calming activities

A well-designed and well supported sensory circuit can help regulate a child’s sensory system and prepare them for learning. When they’re done right, they can make a real difference. There are so many positives to sensory circuits ( when they are done in the right frame of time and with a well trained deliverer.)

They can be…

But Here’s the Harsh But True Reality I See In Multiple Schools…

( not their fault BTW!)

In theory, sensory circuits are brilliant but…
In practice, unless a school has a permanent, dedicated setup, they can be a massive job to set up and take down every day. TA’s are already extremely thin on the ground and space is often at a premium.

In my many years of delivering in-school support, I’ve seen this becoming a massive barrier. Staff don’t always have the time, the space, or the training to implement sensory circuits consistently and with the accuracy that they need and deserve. And when something isn’t consistent (IMO) it loses effectiveness and can sometimes make things worse. For example, if you run out of time and don’t hit enough “calming end” to really get a child regulated, you could be sending a pupil into a maths lesson more active than they were when they went in. Likewise, if you make a child too calm they may become so relaxed and almost sleepy that getting in gear for a tough lesson could be near impossible. Its way more complex than many people think!

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So, What Are Sensory Movement Breaks?

Sensory movement breaks are short, responsive, flexible moments throughout the day that support what a child needs right then and there. They might include:

There is no rigid structure, it is just what works for that child in that moment. That’s why I LOVE IT!

Positives of Sensory Movement Breaks

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So, which do Archie and I prefer?

Over the years, and working directly with hundreds of children in schools, I’ve found that sensory movement breaks give me the freedom to use my judgement, professional intuition, and real lived experience knowledge. It’s literally what I have done with my own children their whole lives.

Every child presents differently from day to day, lesson to lesson, moment to moment.
Every classroom has a different atmosphere that can also change in an instant.
Every day brings different challenges, different starting points and different end goals. Even the speed or exertion of the school commute can have a huge impact . There is a real difference in need from a child that has traveled an hour by car compared to the child that has walked for 20 minutes to get in! One will need a calm or soft landing, the other will need a ” wake me up” or an alerting activity to get their brain ready for learning. Some need organising tasks to bring focus while others simply need to calm their body and mind before re-entering learning.

See….its tricky!

In my experience, this level of responsiveness isn’t something you can always get from a pre-planned, fixed sensory circuit. How can it when there are so many variations in need?

And the truth is, many school staff simply haven’t been given the in depth training or lived experience to confidently identify what areas of the sensory circuit need longer than others etc. This isn’t their fault—schools right now are over- stretched, support staff are juggling multiple responsibilities, and sensory expertise isn’t always accessible. Even the ITT packages are very “Surface level “when it comes to SEND training ( IMO) let alone TA the training.

That’s why we champion sensory movement breaks and TA’s with lived experience at Awesome Archie Non Profit.
For me they feel a little more practical, sustainable, child-centred and easier for staff to learn and embed with support. They empower adults to support children in the moment, rather than relying on a system that might not be possible to run consistently.

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Sensory circuits absolutely have value, Sensory movement breaks do too, but the approach that works best is always the one that can be delivered consistently and effectively, with the child’s unique sensory profile at the heart…again , IN MY OPINION!

At Awesome Archie, our lived experience has shown time and time again that flexible, responsive sensory movement breaks are the most realistic and impactful option for most school environments and thats why you’ll often see me and my student on the floor of a corridor with lego 🙂

If your school would like help implementing sensory strategies, training staff, or understanding children’s sensory profiles, we’d be delighted to support you at Neurocreative Media where we can create a bespoke online presentation for you to share with your staff. www.neurocreativemedia.co.uk.

http://www.neurocreativemedia.co.uk

Stumble onto almost any school website in the UK and you’ll probably spot this old beauty…

“Every teacher is a teacher of SEND.”

It’s a powerful statement that signals inclusion and suggests a whole-school commitment.

But here’s the sad truth:

A slogan without action is just website decoration. Oooooph…. I know!!! A few very well-chosen words on a website mean nothing unless they translate into everyday practice, real change, and lived experience for the children who need it the most and, sadly, we are seeing that all too often, they don’t.

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When Inclusion Becomes a Buzzword Instead of a Practice

Schools rarely want to fall short. Many care deeply, but good intentions aren’t the same as meaningful support.

What commonly happens is this:

So, guess what happens?

Children mask, parents chase, teachers firefight… and the phrase “every teacher is a teacher of SEND” becomes nothing more than marketing language or self protection when the inevitable complaints come in!

However, it doesn’t have to be this way. We really want to change the narrative and make that change a long lasting one!

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Equality vs. Equity: Where So Many Schools Still Get Stuck

Equality is giving every child the same thing.
Equity is giving every child what they need to access learning.

From a disability perspective:

Schools often believe they are promoting fairness by treating everyone the same, but fair does not mean identical. Fair means accessible, achievable, and humane.

We have always told our children that “fair isn’t everyone getting the same, it’s everyone getting what THEY need!

Understanding this is the foundation of true inclusion.

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So What Does a Truely Neuroaffirming School Look Like?

A neuroaffirming school doesn’t try to “fix” neurodivergent children or make then fit into the same routines and learning styles. It adapts the environment so the children can thrive, as individuals! In practice this may look like…

Sensory needs being acknowledged and not dismissed

Visual tools are used across the whole school As Standard

Not just for “SEND children,” but for everyone.

Staff FULLY understanding that behaviour is communication

Meltdowns aren’t “naughtiness”.
Shutdowns aren’t “defiance”.
Fidgeting isn’t “poor attitude”.
Instead, staff look for the unmet need underneath.

Language is supportive and affirming, not shaming

No more:

Instead:

Adults model emotional regulation

A dysregulated adult cannot regulate a dysregulated child.
Training matters — but so does culture. No neurodivergent child thrives under a “shouty” or quick to temper teacher!

Parents are partners, not problems

Meetings should be collaborative, not confrontational. These parents are probably terrified for their children’s future and have been consistently let down by a broken system. Believe me when I tell you… It’s ALOT!

Concerns are listened to, not dismissed.
Support plans are co-created, not imposed. Peer support is EVERYTHING!!!!

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So How Schools Can Turn That Famous Buzz Phrase Into Real Action ?

Here are practical ways that schools can ensure that saying “every teacher is a teacher of SEND” is a genuine statement and not just a cool thing to say!

Whole-school CPD that is practical, not theoretical

Teachers need real strategies they can use tomorrow morning — not 50 pages of PowerPoint definitions. Anyone can Google, it’s lived experience where the real learning happens.

Consistent tools in every classroom

Imagine if every classroom used:

Student profiles used daily, not gathering dust in a file

Teachers and TA’s should be able to glance at a child’s profile and know exactly how to support them. We have created you an example for this a little further down 🙂

Neuroaffirming policies, not punitive ones

This means rethinking:

Regular communication and RESPECT between staff, SENCOs, and parents

Support should evolve with the child — not be set once and forgotten. For heavens sake, LOOK AFTER AND LISTEN TO YOUR SENCO’S… THEY ARE EVERYTHING!!!!!!

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Individual Student Profile, Our Student One Pagers

Below is our example of a student profile that a teacher could keep to hand or have easily accessible for new TA’s or supply teachers. We call it the “one pager” because it hits the key points FAST!

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This is the type of tool that turns inclusion from intention into impact.

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Because Inclusion Isn’t a Tagline — It’s a Culture

A school cannot call itself inclusive because it says the right words. It becomes inclusive when children feel safe, understood, supported and valued for who they already are.

“Every teacher is a teacher of SEND” should be more than a trending phrase, it should be a promise — backed up by action, training, compassion and a willingness to rethink the old systems.

Neurodivergent children deserve nothing less. School is tough enough, when you are neurodivergent… its a whole other level!

When we support our awesome students and staff properly, the whole school benefits.

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