Self-care is the act of consciously taking care of your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being to promote health and wellness. It’s about prioritising your needs and engaging in activities that help you feel better and live a more balanced and fulfilling life.
For me as a busy parent carer, this is simply unachievable in its ideal sense. I am not in any way able to prioritise MY needs. Since becoming a mum my entire life has had to revolve around my children because we are a neurodivergent family.
When other people talk about the key aspects of their self care like maintaining a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, exercising etc, I can’t help but feel a little jealous. Not because I would in any way change my life, I wouldn’t, but I do sometimes wonder what life would have looked like for us if we weren’t, well… US!
But then I remember, EVERYTHING we are and EVERYTHING we have is because of our amazing neurogivergent brains.
My husbands professional drive comes from his monotropism. My work here at AA stems from a passion driven by my own ADHD and an innate need to support our own autistic children and the many kids that face similar challenges. Our childrens empathy and extensive knowledge of their rights and the legislation that supports them, comes from their acute sensitivity to injustice…again, a neurodivergent thing!
That’s when I give myself a metaphorical slap and pick myself up. Comparing ourselves to others is fruitless.
However, I am only human. I get tired, I get sad, I get anxious , I get overwhelmed and I have medical support to help me, something for which I will always speak openly about.
So self care for me is not like the majority of peoples. There are no spa days or Hen weekends. There are no romantic meals out alone or lavish parties. But, we have found our own way to look after our mental health and give ourselves some self love and rest!
Disney!!!! Something about Disney has always made me so happy. We go all together and each have our own individual favourite parts. In fairness , holidays of all kinds help us as a family so if you are able…do!!! My mum used to say ” it’s better to have a full memory bank than a financial one” 🙂
Movie nights, where we sit in our lounge with a movie and eat junk food….not nutritionally sound but great for the mental health.
Letting the housework sit for a day. You can always clean up tomorrow once you’ve rested ( although often I cant rest until I’ve tidied, depends on my mood that day!).
PJ weekends, SAY NO TO INVITES AND CHILL OCCASIONALLY….beautiful!!
Have bath with netflix on your phone.
And finally, give yourself some slack. This is NOT easy. The “One day at a time” ethos has got me through some really rough patches.